misaligned.net

Lie #1809

Fweeb — Wed, 20 Jun 2012 05:01:49 +0000

In order to fool ducklings into a false sense of security, hawks are known to fly in reverse so their silhouette more closely resembles that of a duck than a bird of prey.

Lie #1808

Fweeb — Tue, 19 Jun 2012 05:01:54 +0000

Contrary to popular belief, flatulence does not originate in the digestive system. It’s specifically produced by a gland near your armpit. This is why so many people can “fake” fart noises using their armpits. They’re not faking.

Lie #1807

Fweeb — Mon, 18 Jun 2012 05:01:10 +0000

The original origin story for the Incredible Hulk had nothing to do with gamma radiation and everything to do with an accident at a gummy bear factory. The original Hulk had a skin that was covered in delicious gummy candy.

Lie #1806

Fweeb — Sun, 17 Jun 2012 05:01:05 +0000

Carpal Tunnel Syndrome was originally thought to be a disease caused by travelling underwater with raw fish.

Lie #1805

Fweeb — Sat, 16 Jun 2012 05:01:30 +0000

Cheesecake has neither of its component words in its list of ingredients.

Lie #1804

Fweeb — Fri, 15 Jun 2012 05:01:47 +0000

Taste isn’t really one of the 5 senses. In fact, chemically speaking, everything on the planet has a completely identical taste. Our tongues are actually devices give us the illusion that we’re eating things with different tastes even when it all really has the exact same cardboard-like blandness.

Lie #1803

Fweeb — Thu, 14 Jun 2012 05:01:47 +0000

There’s absolutely nothing nerdy about watching your server access logs in real time.

Lie #1802

Fweeb — Wed, 13 Jun 2012 05:01:57 +0000

10% of the human population has their blood swapped with rubber cement little by little each night while they sleep.

Lie #1801

Fweeb — Tue, 12 Jun 2012 05:01:06 +0000

The only proper way to eat chicken is puréed… with peaches.

Lie #1800

Fweeb — Mon, 11 Jun 2012 05:01:48 +0000

Listening to music from a banjo is 5 times more lethal than being struck in the head with a mallet.

Lie #1799

Fweeb — Sun, 10 Jun 2012 05:01:06 +0000

Water doesn’t actually rise when the tide is high. The ground is actually lowering. After all, the continents have no fixed location and are floating in the sea.

Lie #1798

Fweeb — Sat, 09 Jun 2012 05:01:34 +0000

One out of every six American cars is sentient. And 90% of those cars are sexually aroused when you drive them. The remaining 10% vehemently disdain being driven.

Lie #1797

Fweeb — Fri, 08 Jun 2012 05:01:04 +0000

Cats have no definable internal organs. Their insides resemble a meaty sack of oatmeal. This is exactly why it’s so difficult to get a firm grasp on a cat.

Lie #1796

Fweeb — Thu, 07 Jun 2012 05:01:01 +0000

All country and state leaders are given lobotomies at the end of their terms to protect the secrets that they’ve experienced. Some of the less-intelligent leaders do this pre-emptively before their term starts.

Lie #1795

Fweeb — Wed, 06 Jun 2012 05:01:03 +0000

Every one of the world’s most deadly poisons is also considered a low-dose aphrodisiac.